Coaching Communication

So, I know this is kind of not an event, but just in general I find this to be an everyday kind of coaching experience in terms of tone. So, often he will say something to me and then I will model that. He will have like a torn of attitude, like something sounds mean, but it is not angry, and it just sounds mean because he is scripting from something he is heard on YouTube or at school. Then, I will have to model for him to teach how we can say things in a kinder way. But he is quite intelligent, and his speaking does not require a lot of support. But we can grasp and hear the difference. Then I will say, oh, if he says “mummy, thank you so much, for example, then I will say, okay, let’s try this way to make it kind. I ask him to think which one sounds kind.”
I find opportunities when he and I are talking of appropriate times to say certain expressions like the word dang it. Coaching him the tone, like “that is too loud. That is too much.” I am coaching his expressions, such as I say, “when we say certain slang words, or frustration, or anger, we need to have this expression.” It is really difficult, and it is a part of our every day, but I do see success in being consistent. I am finding those teachable moments and coachable moments in everyday life. I have seen a lot of progress. Encouraging him recognizing lengthy sound and a very thematic way every day in day-to-day conversation. So often he learned just one word request and so we still have to sometimes coach him how to make a request such as if he wants water, sometimes he will just say “water.” Then I coached him to say “can I have this please?” “Can I have some water, please? Or will you pass me the water? May I have some water?
I find it very difficult to be regulated myself when he is using a tone or phrases that he doesn't mean to use. And then to then also coach them in it. I find that difficult. It is quite an active like my brain is always working and always active in terms of communication. Sometimes he will still just use one word request. So still really coaching some of start language processing and phraseology and tone is just every day. I have learned a lot about language processing from Instagram and speech therapist. As well as, I have an incredible occupational therapist, behavior specialist and speech therapist who helped me with how to coach my son in daily activities without it being formal session. And yeah, some folks online are really, really, really been very helpful and all the language piece of things. I've seen growth in progress. And I have seen a lot of gains made in his verbal expression and communication. So, I am not as trusted as I was, but I find that so far this seems to come and go in phases. So, I'm waiting for the next phase and kind of regrouping some strengths for the next one. I have learned a lot about how he was walking and seeing how he processes communication. You know this is unique when you have to sort of watch or walking default language processor grow and learn and the neurodivergent brain absorb information and how those finances sort of seem to be forming. And how he really desires to learn and to express himself in appropriate ways.

So, I've done a lot of self a lot of self-taught through finding some really narrow diverse. Neuro affirming speech therapists online, but I also had occupational therapist behavioral specialist. Each therapist, it helped me along the way. Took a long time, took a longer for him to learn how to speak with words. Okay, that’s good. Yeah, so, I have been doing this with him since he was, I guess regulatory two. But I've been working with him on his communication since he was about to die. This is something that I've been doing on my own. And then with self and then some self-learning online as well as now because he is in school, the only person I had access to really, I did one consult with the school speech therapist. And his behavioral therapist through the Department of Families. I have an interest in it. It takes a lot of thinking,
like it is very active, a very active way of communicating. Every conversation you say like whenever there's a coachable moment, so daily basis, I am coaching him.

First of all, there’s some grief involved in that course, because it's harder for him and some of the people with neurotypical kids don't understand what a gift communication is when they don't have to work so hard for it. So, I finally still some grief in there. But I just find the other emotions involved I mean depending on if he is communicating with me in ways that are hurtful. It is very, you know, it is the most difficult you know, we got to take it personally.
Because it is not every day. I think a lot of people don’t understand you know, distort language processing, there are the neurodivergent brain communicate the protesters information and tone and sarcasm and all these little pieces that neurotypical people take for granted. We have to work really hard. And um and I feel very fortunate that I have been able to really understand it and really that helps them have a lot of positive things in this way.